Two weeks of paternity leave places Britain firmly near the bottom of fatherly league tables. It’s time to extend it, writes Cameron Smith
After months of nervous anticipation for your first child’s arrival, the best-laid plans often go awry.
As a new dad, you’ll listen closely to the birth plan your partner carefully arranges with midwives. You’ll prepare to leave work at a moment’s notice with the pretence of an orderly handover. And you’ll tentatively agree to plans with excited family members eager to meet the new addition. But mostly, you’re flying blind, with no real clue what you’re in for.
All that’s manageable. However, the lack of time quickly becomes apparent once your child is on the way and exhausting parenthood beckons. As soon as the clock starts on your short paternity leave, the idea that you can help your partner through the birth, assist her recovery and settle the baby at home in just a few weeks becomes increasingly absurd.
By right, dads are entitled to two weeks of paid paternity leave in the UK. I was lucky, and my employer gave me three despite me being legally entitled to nothing as a new hire. Fewer than a third of dads have access to enhanced paternity rights from their employer, and half of them still only managed to take two weeks, according to Pregnant Then Screwed. YouGov shows that fewer than a fifth of Brits think two weeks or less of paternity leave is enough for new dads. They’re right.
Our inadequate parental employment rights do not recognise the role of dads in those precious few weeks. You are needed as an advocate for your partner in the hospital. You are needed to support her recovery afterwards, which is rarely quick or straightforward. Your newborn needs you as well for everything. And you need time to settle into fatherhood, but this last need is generally forgotten by all, including yourself, in the rush to do everything else.
Most of all, you need time for things to go wrong because they will, as many new parents will attest. I spent the first week of my leave sleeping in the hospital, moving between my wife’s bed and my daughter’s incubator. It wasn’t planned; both were healthy prior, but the birth was long and tricky.
Not long after, my partner and I attempted to sleep for the first time in two days. Only two hours later, still with barely any sleep, we were told our baby’s oxygen levels were too low and she needed to be swiftly admitted to special care. So began a week of treatment against suspected pneumonia while my wife was treated preventatively against sepsis. Both were thankfully fine – one of the medicine miracles we should all be thankful for. Childbirth has never been safer for mother and child, but still far from easy.
However, the lack of adequate paternity leave is one small part of a much bigger problem; it’s too difficult and expensive to start and grow families in Britain today. With housing costs extortionate, making it difficult to live near family for support, and childcare costing as much as a second mortgage, people feel priced out of parenthood. And our lacklustre parental employment rights, whether it’s short paternity leave, ungenerous maternity pay or restrictions on who is eligible, only make it seem more like a choice between a career and family for women. Younger dads like me who increasingly want to play a larger role in family life have neither the rights to do so nor the means to take unpaid leave, the only other option.
These challenges are why Britain has a growing birth gap between the number of children people have and want, and why we need a New Deal for Parents. It will require radical changes to our tax policies, social security system and parental employment rights. But a good place to start would be helping new dads be there right at the beginning for their partner and newborn by tripling paid statutory paternity leave to six weeks. It’s needed to end Britain’s place near the bottom of fatherly league tables, where dads here get two weeks, and a Spanish dad gets sixteen. And it would have made a world of difference to my growing family.
Cameron Smith is head of communications at Onward